How to Stop Psyching Yourself Out When You Need Confidence Fast
Being a human being is playing head games with yourself under the best circumstances. And you don’t always win. Knowing how to stop psyching yourself out in a pinch can help you live to fight another day in those head games.
I am a person who remembers the nineties with fondness and confusion as to how we got through life without GPS or cell phones. To sike, or psych yourself out was a crime. Only could the biggest of school bus bullies sike you out. And that bully also had to yell “SIKE” while doing it.
The psych yourself out meaning I’m after today is the one where you’re in your head. The most common don’t psych yourself out synonym these days is get out of your own way, but I’m not a white influencer, so I don’t feel comfortable saying that.
Instead, I want to talk about how to stop psyching yourself out when you don’t have a lot of time to do the work.
And as always, remember, it doesn’t have to be perfect. Like everything else on this blog, we are going to do this shit real messy.
The Long Journey of Not Psyching Yourself Out
I have this whole post on how I learned to not psych myself out and it’s definitely good if you’re on a journey to learn to trust your gut and follow through with your intentions. But it’s not a quick fix. We’ll get to the quick and dirty psych up in a second. For now, let’s be real.
Like most worthwhile things, it’s going to take time to believe you can do the big scary things, and there’s some significant work in that. You don’t always have time for that work.
But if getting to a point where you can do stuff without questioning yourself, or at least push through that questioning, taking imperfect action and enjoying it takes time. It’s not a linear path, and there are setbacks aplenty!
You can definitely do it. And if you don’t have time at the moment and need to stop psyching yourself out fast, then I’ve got some steps for you to follow.
How to Stop Psyching Yourself Out: The Quick and Dirty
Buckle up, kiddo. You’ve gotta do a thing without talking yourself out of it and you don’t have a lot of time. Queue up your best Spotify playlist full of songs that you would use as your UFC walk out music, and let’s fucking go.
And just a gentle reminder, there is no reset button in life. So you gotta do the thing, and here’s how you’re going to make yourself do it.
001: Eyes on your own paper.
You see all those people around you? Fuck them.
We’re not paying attention to them at all. Not even a little bit. Don’t look at them. DON’T FUCKING LOOK AT THEM.
You put your head down and focus on the work you have to do. Just your work. No one else’s.
You now exist in a vacuum. There is no one else. No one has ever done the thing you’re about to do. No one will ever be able to do what you’re doing.
In this scenario, you’re a lone ranger and you’re taking charge. Don’t look up from your paper. DON’T FUCKING LOOK UP.
It’s just you, baby! ALL YOU.
002: Remember the most “successful” people are fucking jokes.
You don’t have to dig deep to find that all the richest people in the world are that way because they got money and opportunities from their rich parents. You don’t have to look far to see that most politicians are in their positions because they’ve been super connected their whole lives.
Yeah, these people also did some work to get where they are, but the amount of work they’ve done doesn’t justify the success. (Also, having a path laid out for you by parents who can get you where you’re going is infinitely easier than captaining your own ship.) And if you were to do the work too, you wouldn’t get half as far. That might seem demoralizing.
It’s not. It shows that you aren’t someone who needs to use the resources of others to exist. Congrats. You can actually do the thing you want to do, baby. They can’t.
And when you do the thing? It’s going to be huge because you did it all by yourself.
003: Be like the junkyard dog.
A junkyard dog sits, attached to a chain, pulling at the links any time someone comes around. No one crosses them. They’re scary and slobbery and they defend their territory.
That’s you.
You’re going to guard that small radius you have, jumping at anyone who comes near your space. You’re vicious and mistreated and you will fight for whatever bit of ground you have because it’s fucking yours.
While you’ve got your eyes on your own paper, don’t forget to keep everyone the fuck away from it. (This includes well-meaning people. They are generally the reason we psych ourselves out the most.)
So, instead of worrying about others, you’re going to only worry about your little thing, okay? And any time anyone gets close to your thing, you attack.
Not literally. Going to jail doesn’t help you stop psyching yourself out. But you’re going to protect your thing. It’s yours. Hackles up.
004: Schedule those emotions for a later date.
You’re ready to do the thing. That psyching yourself out anxiety is gone for now, to be dealt with later when you’re going to do the actual work of learning how not to psych yourself out.
This method was always a quick fix. It’s great for when you have to do some public speaking in a couple of days, or when you have a huge deadline and feel like you aren’t qualified.
This is a method for getting out of your own head for a while.
But eventually, you’re going to need to be back inside your head. And when you get there, there’s going to be some FEELINGS. They will be uncomfortable. Yes, I know from experience. My life is in shambles and that’s how I get shit done.
So, know that as soon as you do the thing that you successfully avoided the psych out for, you’re going to need to get ready for the vulnerability hangover and all the other emotions that come with it.
Wanna Know How I Psych Myself Up?
There’s a lot of music involved. And caffeine. And candy.
Also, sometimes I just look in the mirror and say “Don’t psych yourself out.” It works like 10% of the time.
Originally published at https://marisamohi.com on September 26, 2022.
